Do you really mean to say no, but you always say yes just to be nice? Do you take insulting, sarcastic comments from a close friend or family member without ever telling them that it hurts your feelings?

If you are saying, “Yes, that’s me” or if you could add many more stories of your own, it is time to set boundaries. A boundary is a dividing line between you and others; family members, friends, co-workers. It lets others know what you do or do not want and what you are willing or unwilling to do. It is your responsibility as an adult to let others know what is or is not acceptable to you.

Setting boundaries is not an easy task. You not only have to set the boundary, but you must enforce it after you set it. Setting boundaries with acquaintances is easier than setting boundaries with those you love like your family. While it is hard and difficult work, you owe it to yourself to have others treat you the way you want to be treated.

Healthy boundaries are flexible. They allow you to get close to others and maintain a distance when you might be harmed by getting too close.

What does setting boundaries have to do with anger management? By setting and maintaining boundaries you are communicating what you need and want and at the same time not allowing others to take advantage or manipulate you. You are in charge. You let others know what you are willing to “put up with or not put up with.”

When you set a boundary, give a little, get a little. Compromise and met people half way. Maintain your boundaries, but don’t be too rigid. For example, if a friend asks you to go to a movie on Thursday night, but you already have plans with your family for Thursday night. Decline your friend’s invitation to be with your family and tell your friend that you would love to go to the movies on a different night. Give a little, get a little.

If you are ready to learn how to give a little, get a little visit AngerManagementOnline.com where you will get a lot for a little.
 

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